Ep. 218 - Donkey Milk, with Kris Graft

### Ep. 218 - Donkey Milk, with Kris Graft

GameDeveloper.com publisher [Kris Graft](https://twitter.com/krisgraft) joins the panel to cover E3, Square Enix NFTs, what rock and roll really is, and smoking weed at the Sega E3 booth. Hosted by Alex Jaffe, with Tim Rogers, Brandon Sheffield and Kris Graft. Edited by Esper Quinn, original music by Kurt Feldman.

**Questions this week:**

  • 1. How does Jaffe beat his friend in a Metacritic rating betting pool? (04:17)
  • 2. What video game character would you invite to a potluck, and what would they bring? (12:04)
  • 3. What the hell is Square Enix’s problem? (19:10)
  • 4. Design an emote for an online game. (25:58)
  • 5. What would a Rockstar Games version of an Orlando theme park be like? (33:28)
  • 6. [Tim Rogers](https://twitter.com/108) asks: You guys wanna talk about E3? (40:46)
  • 7. Dirtbag Mike Larkey asks: Design a recently public domain Winnie-the-Pooh game (47:57)
  • 8. Violence Island (53:52)
  • 9. What is rock and roll? (01:05:06)
  • Recommendations and Outro (01:12:44)


  • - [Metacritic](https://www.metacritic.com/)
  • - [Sifu](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sifu_(video_game))
  • - [Horizon: Zero Dawn](https://www.mobygames.com/game/playstation-4/horizon-zero-dawn)
  • - [Days Gone](https://www.mobygames.com/game/days-gone)
  • - [Cooking Mama](https://cookingmama.fandom.com/wiki/Mama)
  • - [Crash Bandicoot](https://crashbandicoot.fandom.com/wiki/Crash_Bandicoot)
  • - [Bubsy](https://bubsy.fandom.com/wiki/Bubsy_(character))
  • - [Little Mac](https://punchout.fandom.com/wiki/Little_Mac)
  • - [Master Chief](https://halo.fandom.com/wiki/John-117)
  • - [Marcus Michael Fenix](https://gearsofwar.fandom.com/wiki/Marcus_Michael_Fenix)
  • - [Bayonetta](https://bayonetta.fandom.com/wiki/Bayonetta_(character))
  • - [Shin Megami Tensei V](https://www.mobygames.com/game/switch/shin-megami-tensei-v)
  • - [The Ninja Warriors](https://www.mobygames.com/game/ninja-warriors)
  • - [Square Enix’s New Years letter talking about NFTs and other trash](https://www.hd.square-enix.com/eng/news/2022/html/a_new_years_letter_from_the_president_2.html)
  • - [Cryptoland](https://boingboing.net/2022/01/06/is-cryptoland-the-first-physical-crypto-island-a-parody-of-nft-culture-is-parody-even-possible.html)
  • - [Fortnite](https://www.mobygames.com/game/fortnite-battle-royale)
  • - [Destiny](https://www.mobygames.com/game/destiny_)
  • - [The Macarena](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWaymcVmJ-A)
  • - [Gangnam Style](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cGc_NfiTxng)
  • - [Voldo](https://soulcalibur.fandom.com/wiki/Voldo)
  • - [Bayonetta’s Avocado Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLeJICR-Wqc)
  • - i’m not gonna link that whale milking picture, thank me later
  • - [Grand Theft Auto series](https://www.mobygames.com/game-group/grand-theft-auto-series)
  • - [Hot Coffee](https://gta.fandom.com/wiki/Hot_Coffee_Modification)
  • - [BioShock Infinite](https://www.mobygames.com/game/bioshock-infinite)
  • - [Jungle Cruise (2021)](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0870154/)
  • - [A Christmas Carol (2009)](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1067106/)
  • - [The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0104940/)
  • - [Attack of the Friday Monsters!](https://www.mobygames.com/game/3ds/attack-of-the-friday-monsters)
  • - [Banjo-Kazooie](https://www.mobygames.com/game/banjo-kazooie)
  • - [Hook](https://www.mobygames.com/game/sega-cd/hook)
  • - [Story of Seasons series](https://www.mobygames.com/game-group/harvest-moon-story-of-seasons-series)
  • - [Bomber Man](https://bomberman.fandom.com/wiki/Bomber_Man)
  • - [Bomb Man](https://megaman.fandom.com/wiki/Bomb_Man)
  • - [Mighty Bomb Jack](https://strategywiki.org/wiki/Mighty_Bomb_Jack)
  • - [Bomberman Hero](https://www.mobygames.com/game/bomberman-hero)
  • - [Minecraft Steve](https://minecraft.fandom.com/wiki/Player)
  • - [Cubivore](https://cubivore.fandom.com/wiki/Cubivore:_Survival_of_the_Fittest)
  • - [Manic Miner](https://tropedia.fandom.com/wiki/Manic_Miner)
  • - [Mr. Driller](https://mrdriller.fandom.com/wiki/Mr._Driller)
  • - [Chao](https://sonic.fandom.com/wiki/Chao)
  • - [Chocobo](https://finalfantasy.fandom.com/wiki/Chocobo)
  • - [VMU](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/VMU)
  • - [PocketStation](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PocketStation)
  • - [The Hurt Locker (2008)](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0887912/)
  • - [The Beatles](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Beatles)
  • - [Elvis Presley](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elvis_Presley)
  • - [Cream](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cream_(band))
  • - [Led Zeppelin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Led_Zeppelin)
  • - [Sister Rosetta Tharpe](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sister_Rosetta_Tharpe)
  • - [Chuck Berry](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chuck_Berry)
  • - [Lil Nas X](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lil_Nas_X)
  • - [The Beatles: Get Back](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9735318/)
  • **Thanks:**
    **Brandon:** Syzygy of the Insert Credit Forums

    **Jaffe:** thanking Syzygy
    **Kris**: [Alan Partridge audiobooks](https://www.audiobooks.com/audiobook/i-partridge-we-need-to-talk-about-alan/307312)
    **Tim**: Don’t bother looking into what Wordle is

    Support on [Patreon](https://www.patreon.com/insertcredit)

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    I think I forgot to mention that hank's pants came off as he did the front roll

    “I can promise you, it’s not gonna be called Donkey Milk.”

    “You say that. But wait until you hear this fucking thing.”

    -Actual conversation between Esper and me

    That sound editing gag in the intro where Esper put in the noise of disagreement made me laugh so hard I had to rewind to hear anything said after it.

    there's never been a better value!

    Man, this was near-chaos. I loved it.

    Re: Square Enix. I still struggle to fathom quite how confidently tone deaf that letter is to the point of acknowledging just how terribly NFTs will be received by the public. I feel for their PR teams - those guys must be swimming in big pools of liquid turds trying to keep afloat of the backlash whilst also not echoing the sentiment that their CEO is a complete fucking moron.

    @“TheFragranceOfDarkCoffee”#p53332 both Tim and Jaffe having a soundboard now is going to present some interesting challenges going forward.

    Thanks @Syzygy

    thanks @Syzygy

    dunno if there's a more appropriate thread for this but re: upcoming console ranking episode I saw this cool infographic just now:

    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/SlKahOP.jpeg]


    Llama milk. Easy question


    @“Syzygy”#p53349 thank YOU! I had the realization recently that I hadn‘t had to do a lot of moderation or monitering of the forum after the first few months, and then the second realization that that’s because you‘re doing a good job moderating! And I’d never specifically called that out, it was overdue!!

    Platypus “sweat” milk

    Thanks Syzygy

    Thanks Syzygy

    hey I said something really mean about @Syzygy and now the post is gone wtf

    BTW if anybody doesn't know sister rosetta tharpe, she was one of the first, if not the first, to put distortion on her guitar in popular music.

    here she is in 1938:


    now 1944, pretty straight boogie woogie rock & roll:

    then by the 60s, blammo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JeaBNAXfHfQ

    sorry most of these aren't previewable ;_;

    This episode was great. For some reason I can’t recall the pod talking about Metroid Dread, so I was happy to hear that they didn’t really like it. I tried the demo, and while the late game does look more interesting, I wasn’t really as excited as everyone else seemed to be. I’d appreciate any opinions to the contrary.