Real life fake sport - the professional wrestling thread

Was looking around for a place to scream into the void about that MJF promo from last night‘s Dynamite and realized there wasn’t one, so I figured I'd create it.

So: How about [that MJF promo](https://vidsli.com/watch/ZQcMeTz5Xb) from last night's Dynamite? I'm usually not really a sucker for worked shoots -- I like my fake sport to exist in its own fake universe -- but as a Long Island Jew I've longed for MJF to be cheered outside of Nassau County and him as "the guy who makes you feel things" up against a corporate champ seems like a direct ticket to the MJF babyface show. Could he take the belt off a heel Punk at All Out? Feels a little soon for both the turn and the change, but this MJF story is 100% a main event level story so I'm not entirely sure what else he could do.

Also, just completely wild that there's a wrestling show on basic cable in 2022 that has CM Punk as its top champ calling out Hiroshi Tanahashi. My fantasy booking of 2014 has apparently come to life.

In addition to Punk vs Tanahashi, there are apparently rumors that Kazuchika Okada vs Hangman Adam Page is on the Forbidden Door card. Anything else you'd like to see? I'm surprised by no Moxley vs Tanahashi, so I'd love to see something like Mox vs Shingo Takagi instead.

And while the pro wrestling sign JRPG Wars could probably take up their own thread, I see no reason not to kick this one off with an Insert Credit panel member's major contribution to wrestling:

![](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FCv0coMVEAI4DtK?format=jpg&name=small)

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Oh man glad to see some MJF appreciation here. He’s my favorite wrestler. I haven’t been as up to date and am behind a PPV or so, but every bit of story I see him involved in is pure gold. My friend knows how much I like MJF so he bought me a scarf that looks like his and I have worn it un-ironically.

Bringing this thread back. RIP to the greatest.

https://youtu.be/z-Lj_4kwZck?si=PwH_2sTs0TLvHDSj

https://youtu.be/me_xmMuPfVU?si=dYfOZnGm21Ur-dsI

@hellomrkearns

“I can't make them believe that wrestling is real, but I can make them believe that I am real.” -Terry Funk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=3ZpLRIwRxs0&feature=youtu.be

@onefiftythree This game is free on phone if you have Netflix. Anyone played it?

I just realized WrestleMania is live on Netflix this year for some reason, and starts in about 15 minutes.

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The way wrestling has invaded popular culture in the last decade has fascinated me. I used to watch quite a lot of it with my dad and brothers when I was 10-13 (we even got a few pay per views!), but I’ve not seen it since then and it feels like there’s too much that’s happened for me ot ever jump back in.

Of course this is silly since the show is meant to be picked up by any jabroni who happens to stumble across it in the dark, but it will forever feel to me like I’m picking up a book in the middle.

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I was watching this video about the worst gimmicks in wrestling:

It started out kind of funny, but as it rolled on, I just kept getting sadder and sadder. These were real people with dreams and hopes, people who had made a lot of sacrifices to be a part of the wrestling industry…and then Vince McMahon gave them some awful costume or character trait (like making a female wrestler fart all the time (yes, this is actually one of the gimmicks)) because he thought it was funny, and that was the end of that person’s respectability as a wrestler…

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Oh hey there’s a wrestling thread! I happen to be going to a show on Friday. Minoru Suzuki and Satoshi Kojima will be there!

I don’t follow any of the major promotions anymore. I’ll occasionally look in on New Japan, but I’m not following the G1 or anything right now. But, I do still think it’s a heck of a sport and I enjoy a good match every now and then. And when the rare wrestling show rolls through, I try to go.

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i only really follow the big events like the rumble and WM, but last year i also took a look at AEW all in and also watched forbidden door since people in the action button discord were streaming it anyway. WWE seems to be in a great spot right now

Here’s a photo of Minoru Suzuki I took where he looks like a cryptid I spotted in the wilderness

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To misquote Terry Funk, “I can’t make them believe that wrestling is real, but I can make them believe Big Foot is real.”

Minoru, dude, what a baddie. I bet he was slapping and kicking people like it was real life.

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Oh shoot, we have a wrestling thread? Wrestling is my obsession. Here are my random thoughts on current wrestling stuff:

  • Last night’s Ospreay vs. MJF hour long match was incredible and I cannot stop thinking about all the great spots throughout. The best thing a match that long can do is make time fly by and they did exactly that. I cannot believe they went that long at that pace.
  • I’m curious how the G1 will turn out this year. The four block format didn’t really work out, and it seems like Tanahashi has gotten involved in the booking because it’s been a bit better since he did that 10 point plan, but I still don’t trust Gedo. There should be some great matches (Shingo vs. ZSJ will be the likely match of the tournament and I can’t wait for Takeshita vs. Tsuji), but there’s some stinkers in there (AKA all the Bullet Club members). I have ZSJ as my predicition to win this year.
  • Templario has been the standout guy in CMLL this year. He has had nothing but good to amazing singles matches. CMLL continues to be my favorite promotion over the past couple of years and those Friday night shows are always a blast.
  • All Japan is quietly great and Yuma Anzai is having a tremendous first run with the Triple Crown.
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Today I learned there are a WCW restaurant in 1999. These item names are so funny to me. What’s everybody getting?





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I’ll do as I would have as a kid and order whatever has my favorite wrestler’s name on it: I’ll have the Macho Man Nachos please.

Boy, whoever made this thing really mailed it in on a lot of the names. “Nacho Man Randy Savage” is just sitting right there.

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Jimmy’s Hart’s Pasta and a Big Boy Brownie

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Sting Burger - no tomato.

There should be two different Sting burgers though. One for classic neon Sting and the other for Crow Sting.

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Bon appetit:
teal
burger

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