Weird games I found on my Xbox, a Thread

Some time ago I put out word that I wanted an original Xbox so i could play precisely 2 games: Wreckless: The Yakuza Missions and Outrun 2. A friend of mine runs a business through craigslist deals and at some point obtained a large tupperware container full of modded consoles, one of which was an original Xbox. Lo and Behold I brought it home and discovered not just several emulators for most major consoles, but near-complete japanese and english romsets for most of them.

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/HUIqOfz.png]

(not my xbox but here for reference purposes)

So with a wealth of endless games, I decided to start sampling some of the weirder and more obscure things I come across.

1) Slot machine game for Neo Geo Pocket

https://i.imgur.com/s1oRcP4.png</s>https://i.imgur.com/s1oRcP4.png<e>

Yeah just keep hitting A. you can‘t change bet or anything, and there’s nothing you can do with the money. This is the perfect video-game, you can even look up your stats and see how much you've won or lost. I cannot believe they ported Destiny 2 to the Neo Geo Pocket. I played this for roughly 12 minutes on my 1080p tv, downscaled to 480p via the component cables, hitting the A button on my xbox controller. it was surreal. 6/10

2) Dive Alert: Matt‘s Story for Neo Geo Pocket Color

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/eeqnOOo.jpg]

Yeah a real weird one, i wasn’t sure what to expect on this. I loaded it up and was immediately greeted by a very long introduction sequence with several characters that seemed to go on for about 10 minutes.

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/ULOQdBs.png]

So the premise as near as I can tell is the entire world is covered in water and infested with robots. A group of people on submarines earn credits by destroying the robots, with the goal of immigrating to this Elysium like paradise if they earn enough credits. However: they need to spend credits on ship repairs and upgrades, so it becomes a sysiphyian endless grind of repairing one‘s submarine and killing robots.

The actual “gameplay” is this: a simplistic radar like interface where you steer your ship and fire torpedoes at radar signatures. It is really unresponsive. It has tank controls. It’s set underwater. Are you thrilled yet?

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/PSSOjlp.png]

So as near as I can tell the game is just really long VN style dialog sequences, and tank-controls style submarine gameplay. I have no idea if I'm going to play it further. However: the writing and character are is really good, and considering the game is mostly dialog it might be worth it to see a bit more of the game through. The game even has the sheer gall to break the 4th wall within the first 10 minutes[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/jsoibir.jpg]

3) The Manhole - Turbogrfx 16 CD

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/NuhN9A0.png]

I didn‘t play it, however, a japan-only port of one of Cyan’s early Hypercard games is something I am certainly going to look into. I did find and play Cosmic Osmo on the Internet Archive, and you should too!

I‘m gonna watch this thread as it unfolds, but let me just say, that is the ultimate xbox right there. I mean you look at that thing and you think, "yeah, now that’s an xbox"

I reeeeeeeeeally wish I liked the dive alert games. it's such a neat idea, but the non-VN bits are just so tedious. I think I've started the game 5 times and never gotten further than you did.

Even the cosmetics work right into the Xbox ethos.

I went deep down the original Xbox modding rabbit hole this very year. Seems like anyone who still has an original Xbox has one that acts like this. I only wanted to play a handful of exclusives like Steel Battalion and Otogi without having to rely on the dying DVD drive, but man! You can do a lot with these things, which helps justify the real estate.

whoah how‘d you find J Allard’s personal XBOX

One of the consoles emulated on this Xbox is the SuperVision, which seems to be a Very Sad Gameboy clone with a variety of equally sad and bizzare games that seem to run terribly even when emulated. I think the best place to start here is Hero Kid. A primative platforming game where you play as hero…kid

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/ZIBMX46.jpg]

You have an energy meter, and it isn‘t really clear on if that’s health or stamina, since it seems to go up or down at random. You collect hearts floating in the air, and you jump over rocks. It feels incredibly terrible

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/3fsevBI.png]
You cannot, it turns out, clear this fire obstacle. i tried several times and the hitboxes are so large and the jump distance is so small that it's impossible to get over unless it's frame perfect. I cannot imagine being a child, asking for a gameboy for christmas, and getting a SuperVision and also a copy of Hero Kid, and experiencing just an incredible amount of life-changing disappointment [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/UgFreXc.png]

The only game that wasn't a terrible Smup or clone or anything was "Chimera", a game where you're an astronaut on a ghost ship and you're trying to stop it's nuclear self destruction. In practice you walk around while food and water meters go down, exploring various rooms, if you interact with the wrong object you die instantly. I managed to pick up a coffee cup and restore some water score. The graphics look pretty good considering the limitations [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/fPvfTf2.jpg]
Because I am a racing game nerd I had to check out the game's apparent straight up ripoff of F1 Race. It has the same graphics and boost mechanic, as well as tracks [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/xLbFDYF.jpg]
. However it runs at about 5FPS and has no sound. Dreadful

Some Arcade games now! There seem to be several thousand of these on the machine, it's overwhelming!

First one is AB Cop. AB stands for Air Bike. It's a super scaler game where you ride on the jet bike and run into a set number of other bikes per stage, then there's a boss battle at the end. It has a dizzying sense of speed. I don't endorse being a cop and subjecting a variety of biomutants, gangsters, and cocain ninjas (on superbikes) to wanton extrajudicial violence.
[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/vyKXAYk.png]
[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/nspFeN7.png]

I dove into the Lynx games to find STUN Runner, which I played a few levels previously. It's a very blocky tunnel 3D racer. You hit boost pads and avoid obstacles. If you go fast enough the entire screen flashes with alternating colors and I think I almost got a headache. The sense of speed and lack of control is palpable, but mainly I'm just amazed they managed some form of 3D graphics...for the Lynx [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/r0vpm0x.png]
Last one for today, i feel no weird games post is going to be complete without a stop at the N64 Port of Daikatana. Most N64 ports are cursed, and Daikatana is also cursed. so this is a DOUBLE CURSED game.
[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/MUCfkGy.jpg]
This sure is a Quake 2 engine game running on the N64, I will give it that much. The C buttons are apparently mapped to directional input, and the left stick is mapped to looking up down left and right. So they're flipped from conventional Console FPS Controls. I think if I went into the settings I could flip enough of them for this game and get close to the real deal. This even has a radial menu for weapon selection, so ahead of it's time! Unlike regular console FPSes, there's no bullet magnetism or targeting assistance, so you basically stand in front of a bunch of turrets that are constantly firing at you, trying to aim and fire before dying. There's frogs and dragonflys in the level.

Unfortunately much like Hero Kid I was stopped by this obstacle, Crouch isn't mapped to the controls and thus I was defeated by a partially opened door

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/XxrZyMO.png]

@marlfuchs2#168 this is actually kind of amazing and I want to play these dumb games

@azure#175 Yeah I might get into more of them, there's so few Super vision games one could probably play them all in an afternoon.

[upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/VnWKdzO.png]
ITs SO shitty looking ugh! lol

@marlfuchs2#71 manhole is probably my most formative game experience, so of course i found a way to take a tour of cyan worlds and

  • 1. yes the whole building looks like its out of myst. there is broken brick wall for an arch doorway, paths that lead to rocks and waterfalls, and its unmarked off the side of an eastern washington road
  • 2. i pulled the fucking lever from myst
  • 3. i eventually found the manhole corner, the whole reason for my pilgrimage BUT I HAD TO FUCKING SEARCH. which is a very manhole experience to have i think, its like beating the manhole ARG
  • Oh, I remember seeing those things somewhere. In hindsight they look like they were retrofitted from a cardio tracker for suburban legwarmer-owners.

    @daphaknee#191 So this is where I brag I briefly worked with Robyn Miller on some unreleased side project of his. One very surreal moment was him discovering the 3D modeling software he was using contained models he built for Myst as example models. One of the things he was very adamant on was the look and feel for leavers and controls, everything had to have a particular weight and feel to them, so it tracks that their HQ would follow suit. I wish more videogame studios had secret passages like that, pulling an IRL myst lever sounds fantastic. I didn't know they also had a manhole cover.

    Everyone should play Drihoo for an hour or two

    That CoinOps arcade emulator comes with a staggering number of games even in the “Lite” version, and all I wanna play is Osman, aka Strider Too? (It's on there :+1:)

    @marlfuchs2#187

    The Supervision has a dock that allows you to play games on a TV ([url=https://www.diskman.com/presents/supervision/tvlink.htm]Source[/url]), 25 years before the Switch made that "cool."

    It displays this image on the LCD when playing on the TV:

    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/vSw8R7q.gif]

    eat your heart out nintendo

    Decided to Dive back into the turbografx 16 games. I have also managed to spell “Turbografx” every way incorrectly.

    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/o4pft3H.png]

    Yeah lets go with a game for small children! The New Zealand Story appears to be a platforming game where you play as a kiwi bird with a bow and arrow, you traverse each level full of infinitely spawning enemies to free your bird girlfriend

    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/W8KB6mC.png]

    Yeah that's not grim…at all…nope

    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/eGJhRoQ.png]

    Into about the third level or so the game gets absolutely brutally hard. In this screenshot you have several enemies throwing objects at you, tiny platforms you have to precisely land on or hit instant death spikes, and all the while enemies are spawning in endlessly. One hit and you die. I would call this a unassuming masocore game. I could not, for the life of me, get past this point.

    Anyway the next one is a real gem. Silent Debuggers. You play as a kind of bounty hunter traversing a monster-filled abandoned space station. While trying to activate the station, it's self destruct sequence is triggered, and the game starts a 100 minute countdown timer. It's actually pretty thrilling to play because events unfold and the situation changes level by level.
    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/1J3rTZw.png]
    The entire time you're playing you get contacted by your partner Leon to either come back to the computer room, or do other things. Most of the time he tells you to hurry up because you're going too slow.
    [upl-image-preview url=//i.imgur.com/DMs4Q5h.png]
    The main game is traversing these endless hallways and shooting aliens, so it's almost like a proto FPS? The problem is all the hallways look identical, there's no real time map, and so it's very easy to get lost or turned around. You can also only go forward, back, and turn left or right. There's a reticle on screen you can position so you can hit individual alien limbs but in practice it's very hard to do. I might go back to this one and try to complete it despite being so difficult.

    obviously I have a lot to say about turbografx stuff!

  • -

    new zealand story is so intensely difficult, I hate that platformers of the era were so hard. just let me play it by darn!

  • -

    silent debuggers is neat, it's one of those games I just did not understand as a kid, but as an adult I see this is basically a PC-98 game on a pc engine, which is neat? This was following the pc game trends of the time, but on console, which is kind of a rare thing. I wanna get better at this one too - I want to also check whether they didn't increase the difficulty in the US version or something? That happens sometimes, but maybe this isn't one of those.